Are you in a Situationship?

One of the most grueling things about the modern dating world is the process of courtship turned relationship. When you’re friends with benefits, you usually know it. That’s your relationship label. In a situationship, you usually have no idea what’s going on. A situationship is a pseudo-relationship. Urban Dictionary describes a situationship as any problematic relationship characterized by one or more unresolved, interpersonal conflicts, usually confused with dating. It’s just like a placebo, where it might feel like a relationship at times but there are boundaries and limited expectations out of this association.

You aren’t even going on dates

You’ve been seeing each other so long that the dinner and movie nights out have transitioned to Netflix and chill and you’ve made noticeably less effort into getting gussied up to see each other. You hang like you’ve been together for a long time, but there’s still a massive elephant in the room.

You don’t have a title.

You don’t even know what to call them when confronted with situations of introduction or mere mention. You may not even be sure if you can call them a friend. As a result, you frequently find yourself fumbling to find words to describe their status or gazing off into space as you try to find the words to delineate your relationship.

There are no pictures of you in any public setting

Situationships often last as long as they do merely because neither party is quite prepared to let go of that semblance of something. Being in a situationship is not the same as being a friend with benefits. You haven’t taken any pictures together or haven’t posted anything to social media alluding to any sort of idea that you’re in a pseudo relationship.

You avoid discussing the future

Talking about your long game in life, the five and ten year plan and relationship goals are practically taboo subjects. You don’t know where you stand and you avoid discussing it at all costs.

You’re living that vampire life.

If you take the time to reflect, you may find that most of the time you’ve spent together is in a closed setting and/or mostly at night. You’re either at his place or she’s at yours and there’s hardly ever anyone else around. There are no welcomed surprise visits and while you may spend the night, none of your things will.

You never know when you cross over to the other side and start expecting more.